I want your love. Love, love, love. I want your love.

Hallo!

How're you all doing?

I wish I could say good, but I can't.

I'm alive I guess, and that's a start.

I hackin' love my new guitar.

It's so badass. Oh, I didn't tell you guys about it, did I?

I got a PS3, a guitar, and a couple games over the weekend. WIIIN.

I'm learning how to play the geetar soon. :]

I'm so flipping addicted to Osu! (PC), Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days (DS), Left 4 Dead (PC), Call of Duty Modern Warfare (PC), and Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 (PS3). I play them all, like daily.

You're jealous, I know. Haha, just kidding.

... At least I don't play World of Warcraft.

.___.

Uhh, aaaanyways...

Wow, school sucks. I'm in community service, downloading footage from a camcorder. I'm gonna edit it soon. :]

I love video production/editing. I find it very entertaining and satisfying.

I also love hair dressing and cosmetology, and I'm going to a tech school next year for them both. Thank "god" I'm getting outta here. I can't wait. :]

Well, I gotta go. The film's almost done importing and I have some work to do. Just thought I'd update you. :]

Much love,

Nikki <3

I thought I had it all, but I gave it away.

Wow. So I ran away Sunday morning, and that really wasn't the smartest idea that I've ever had.
These are the song lyrics that sum up Sunday.
"Travel far away from fear and disaster.
Take a chance and run now.
I still can't believe.
Could you be the one that rescues me?
I'm alive for the first time."
This kid who I've been talking to for two years now came to get me.
I'm not going to get into details, but it obviously didn't go very well.
I'm just posting this to let you guys know -if there's anyone out there reading this- that I probably won't be blogging for a little while.
I really screwed up. > <
Well, I'll talk to you guys as soon as possible.
Much love,
Nikki. <3 xx

Find me face up, in everything I am.

Soo. Staying up last night until 1 A.M. blogging wasn't the smartest idea.
Haha, well at least I feel a little bit better now that what I had on my chest is out there.
Right now, I'm in period six. I'm supposed to be doing "community service" right now, but instead I'm sitting here and blogging. (:
Oh, the addiction I have to blogging.
Today I've had another huge realization, and it makes me happy now that I'm discovering so much about myself.
My life is like a long rope, or a string or Christmas lights.
When I ignore things that are per say negative, I'm just tossing the rope into a box. I can avoid it for now, but come time when I have to take it out of the box I'll regret avoiding it. It will have spiraled into a chaotic tangled mess, and it will take a lot of time to unravel it.
This is the process I'm going through right now. I'm slowly but surely unraveling the rope of my life. No one ever said it was going to be easy, but hey, that's life for you.
I'm happy all I have to do is unravel my inner rope, and not dodge bullets or hide in a bomb shelter.
I really am very lucky, no matter what I may say.
I have a roof over my head, food to eat, a family to love, a school to learn in.
Life is difficult sometimes, and it's hard for me to stomach.
This is one of my faults, but I'm working on working it out.
Just thought I'd point this out. I'd still like to know if there's anyone out there reading this. If there is, what do you think? I'd love to hear your opinions.
Peace and love,
Nikki <3 xx

To hell with the bad news, dirt on your new shoes.

Ah, nothing like a 1 A.M. blog.
How have you guys been?
I've honestly been better, but I'm trying to look on the bright side.
I've only got to be in school for three more years, and then I'm outta here.
It seems like so short of a time ago that I was first learning to walk.
It seems that it was just yesterday that I spoke my first words, rode my first bike.
Time really flies by so quickly when you're having fun.
I'm a mere fourteen years young, and I already feel like I've accomplished so much in my life.
I feel like any moment now I'll be in my own house or apartment paying my own bills with a full-time job.
Well, soon enough that's going to be happening.
In two years I'll have my permit, and in about two and a half I'll have my liscence.
That means I'll have to have a job and get enough pay to support myself, because I need to realize that my mum isn't going to be here my whole life to hold my hand.
I may be a bit young to be thinking about these things, but really, if you think about it, in three years I'll be out of my house.
I'll be out on my own in this big scary place we call the world.
Everything will be so new to me, as if I'll be leaving my house for the first time in my life.
But this is what we all go through, right?
I mean, at some point in everyone's life they leave their home to go out on their own and lead their own beautiful lives with families and picture perfect houses.
I guess I've just been thinking a lot lately, and I've come to realize that this is the time in my life where I need to figure out what I want to do with my life.
It's been a period of awakening for me, and I really need to start figuring some things out.
Have you guys had this time in your life yet? I'm sure you have...
Well, that's all for tonight. It's been a long week, and I'm so happy that tomorrow/today's Friday.
I hope you all have an amazing weekend, and remember everything you're greatful for in your life.

P.s. I kind of feel like I'm always talking to myself on here. Haha, I only have about 34 page views, half of which are from me. Is there anyone out there?